It was big. Not just big, long too. You might not understand what place or a thing that I am talking about but you will know later if you read more. By this experience I learned that you shouldn't talk about something if you haven't tried yet.
In GLPS I went my first time skiing. Of course it was nervous. I waited about 5minutes with my friends who were the same class as me in ski. Finally our teacher came out. We learned from the beginning and practiced only on the bottom of the skiing ground. We didn't ride the lift. So I knew it would be boring and scaring. Because it was my first time I didn't ride good so it was embarrassing.
But there were my best friends riding with me so I got courage. The next time I rode the ski we met a new teacher named 김대민. He increased our skiing skills right away and we went to the lift right away so I got a big self-confidence. Later nearly the end of the skiing lesson we rode with the best class in GLPS camp. We boasted to everyone and since that time know I love to ski. And I think I'm good at it now. Our team swiftly came down from the top with excitement.
Learning how to ski was very hard for me. But after learning everything seemed easy so I knew that everything will seem hard if you don't try. Not only did I learn I also learned a new lesson. It was 'Do not fear or opposite to what you haven't done yet.
JongWook, I like that you tried something new in your intro, but I think it should give some more information. It is good to keep the reader wondering, but perhaps it is too vague. The last paragraph is also awkward. Not only means there should be at least two examples, but you only gave your one lesson.
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